Week 3 Rants and Raves

Fantasy Week 3 Rants and Raves

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Conan the Barbarian once said: “Crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and hear the lamentation of their cheerleaders.”

To grade the team or downplay the strength of the Rams would be foolish.  Last week after the Ravens played poorly and fell to the Titans we heard and read that the Titans get paid too.  Well, the Rams get paid as well and were just dominated.

Torrey Smith, I recall a certain writer for a local newspaper trashed him for his play and preseason.  Good thing they are going to charge money for service, they are going to find out quick what their opinions are worth.  Kid was huge.  You know what is irony?  Julio Jones, vs. Torrey Smith, talk about getting mileage out of a second round draft pick vs. giving up your draft for one dude.

Reason I bring this up is Ozzie Newsome has gotten some grief over the years for the Ravens drafting of wide receivers.  Torrey Smith, undrafted LaQuan Williams, and Tandon Doss might be around for a long time.

Another observance to use as a measuring stick, the Ravens lost some points with some for losing to the Titans in their home opener.  Meanwhile the Patriots were untouchable.  That was last week.  Can’t wait to see how the power polls spin Buffalo beating the Patriots!  I just like pointing this out, because it is a long season and we have a few nicked up players, but you have to feel good about this team.

Oh, by the way, take a stroll out in your yard or local park.  Why?  Because somewhere out there, the Joe Flacco bash brigade is hiding under their rocks. 

Sure, I said he did not play like a top 5 QB last week, and he didn’t.  Neither did Brady this week!  I do not care how many points Brady put up, Brady threw 4 picks!  What I am talking about is Joe had a bad game against a good team last week.  This week he had his best game against a weak team.  That is football.  The nonsense I read on message boards or hear on the radio is just that nonsense. Joe is the quarterback now and for the foreseeable future. 

Just stop making Pizza Hut commercials Joe!

Since I am playing the comparison game; Haloti Ngata vs. Ndamukong Suh.  Suh is nastier, meaner, and a once in a lifetime talent to be as good as he is as young as he is and has the potential to surpass Ngata.  But not yet, Haloti is just a brute.  Pure and simple he is so fast, so strong; I get scared for the other team as he rips into their line like a Steeler Chick at the buffet table.

Let’s take a look around our division:

The Steelers get lucky and face a Manning-less Colt team that was down to their third stringer and barely won.  It would have been great to get a game up on them, but let them use up all their lucky charms, horse shoes, and gift games now.  Please send their line some Geritol.  I love how the Ravens are always said to have this aging defense.  It is true; Ray Lewis has been playing longer than some high school kids have been alive.  Ed Reed is not a spring chicken either.  But the Steelers get a free pass although half the team could be used as extras in Grumpy Old Men 3.

The Browns eked out a win but still managed to slight me by keeping Peyton Hillis out.  He is on my damn fantasy team, but you have to wonder, when Peyton stayed home and was spraying Chloraseptic on his throat did the Madden cover cross his mind?  The Jinx LIVES!!!

Also on the police beat the Bengals fell to the 49ers.  I wonder if team officials of the Bengals asked the 49ers if they could brings some medicinal marijuana from California for some of their players.  They could easily hide some in the equipment boxes. It’s so much easier than having a few pounds mailed to your house. 

But seriously, if it were my team, I would cut Jerome Simpson and Anthony Collins not for breaking the law, but for taking stupidity to a whole new level. 

What’s next, Jay & Silent Bob hanging on the sidelines next to the tunnel as the Bengals run out just in case someone needs a blunt?

 

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Oliver Kruszka

About Oliver Kruszka

Oliver is a cartographer and GIS analyst for a global energy consulting firm.  When not mapping various aspects of the world, he can be found at the Maryland Renaissance Festival under the surname “Captain Silver” and as a poster here under said name, promoting his brand of humor. He is an accomplished artist in various mediums, published poet, as well as having a stint acting on stage; additionally brewing beer when not distracted by something shiny.  Lifelong fan of the NFL, who’s allegiances have changed as much as Baltimore’s ability to keep a team, makes him an avid Raven fan, but also a fan of the NFL in general (know thy enemy!).  More from Oliver Kruszka

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