Look Cleveland… we need to have a talk.
After reading a few message boards and listening to a few callers on 105.7 on Friday that clearly started hitting the bottle a bit early, I think there’s far too much chest-puffing going on for a city that remained a cellar-dweller and title-less town for eons. It’s about time you take it back a notch and cool your jets, ESPECIALLY when it comes to your Browns and the Factory of Sadness.
We all get it. You finally won a title in one of the major 4 sports, albeit in the NBA which teeters around 3rd of the Big-4, and sits well behind baseball and football. But let’s assess how you got there, shall we?
First, the Cavs were abysmal. Then they fell into the top pick (thanks lottery!) in a great draft where one of the top players to ever grace the NBA happened to fall into your laps (Google ‘NBA draft rigged’ for a good time). It’s like when the Colts fell into Andrew Luck when Peyton Manning got hurt, leading the Colts to the ‘Suck for Luck’ campaign trail.
But back to LBJ- he was so incensed with the team that he left! Left his home town to go play for a title in Miami! Fans burned jerseys and the owner wrote a scathing letter, and yet… he returned like an ex after she got bored with her side piece she left you for. Of course it wasn’t just a return to ‘come home.’ No, LeBron came back after the Cavs have a few poor seasons leading to the drafting of Kyrie Irving & some key players, then the team blew the bank on some role players, and thus, you finally won your title.
LEBRON CAME HOME WHEN HE KNEW HE COULD ACTUALLY WIN WITH THE CAVS.
Kudos.
Ironically, that’s the same general pattern followed by your currently first place Indians: suck for a while, draft at the top end of the draft, which leads to success.
Can’t fault the model!
… Then there’s your Browns.
Perennial losers. Cellar Dwellers. Cream of the Crap.
Despite the success of Cleveland’s NBA and MLB franchises, both applying the ‘suck for years, draft high’ mantra, the Browns can’t seem to figure it out. Nor can they get out of their own way.
But at least they draft great! I mean, Trent Richardson 3rd overall? Barkevious Mingo 6th overall? Justin Gilbert 8th overall?
Phenomenal top-10 picks!
Then there’s the supplemental draft where the Browns went after Josh Gordon back in 2012. The same Josh Gordon who has been suspended more than he’s played, and say what you want about whether or not marijuana should be legal in the NFL, the fact of the matter is IT’S NOT LEGAL IN THE NFL. Gordon knew that, and yet he had no problem putting himself into bad positions leading to suspensions. It’s like that whole square-peg-circle-hole ordeal with him.
And yet, despite dropping Manziel because of his off-field behavior and character issues- they keep Gordon? How do you justify that? Because a 4-time suspended wideout who is still uber-talented is more valuable to the franchise than a faltering Manziel who had no chance at being a starter. But instead of owning it, the franchise blames ‘character issues’ for one, while ignore character issues of another.
BEAUTIFUL.
All of these issues, and that’s not even stepping into the steaming pile that is their quarterback debacle. Drafting guys like Johnny Manziel, Brandon Weeden and Brady Quinn ALL in the first round, ALL with the 22nd pick, and ALL within a 9 year stretch, with NONE lasting for their entire rookie contract?
Heck, even when they don’t draft a QB, they jump all over the highly sought after signal callers- right RG-KNEE? Meanwhile a serviceable and much more talented QB in Josh McCown is forced to ride the pine until Griffin made a dumb play and got hurt- an inevitability something that only the Browns would not see coming.
As for the rest, we’ll just keep it simple:
-Jimmy Haslam & Flying J- need I say more?
-Averaging a new head coach every 2 seasons
-Mascot is apparently a dog (or ‘dawg’ as you have it), but shows nowhere on the uniforms and that kills me
– Your stadium is oft referred to as the Factory of Sadness. That’s not good bro.
But by all means Browns fans, keep beating your chest about how great your city is, how much better the Browns are since they beat the Ravens once last year in an anomaly of a Ravens season, and how your team is on the rise. I guess it’s easy to say you’re in line for your best season in a while when you’ve only had .500 or better seasons TWICE since 1999…
