A lot of talk has started this off-season about Jon Gruden being looked at to take up one of the many open head coaching positions. I for one, truly hope he gets a job too. Is it because I respect him as a coach, and think that the NFL is a poorer place without him on the sidelines? Nope. Is it because I think he’d do a great job, and am harboring a secret love for one of the coach-less teams, and think if he gets hired it’ll return that team to prominence? Hell no.
No, the reason is much more simple and selfish than that.
I don’t think I can take him calling MNF games for another season.
I’m old-school when it comes to the color commentary. I miss John Madden. Yes, he had a man-crush on Brett Favre that occasionally bordered on the pornographic (good thing sexting wasn’t in vogue back then). Yes, he wasn’t the smartest man in the world. And yes, at times I wanted to fly to wherever the game was, and wrestle that damned pen out of his hands.
However…
He was truly sincere in his love of the game. His sincerity, excitement, and joy were infectious. No one could get you to care about a game that had no chance of impact on your favorite team in any way like he could. So when ESPN signed Gruden, I was hopeful. I mean, an ex-Raiders coach with a history of saying stupid things and getting overly-excited about his love for the game? Seemed like the perfect pedigree for Madden Jr.
Unfortunately for us all, like a lot of things in football it looked great on paper, but in practice it all fell apart. Right from the get, Gruden tried to take his coaching style into the broadcast booth. With in-your-face combative antics, an annoying laugh, and a perverse love for the Steelers, he had me watching with an iPod drowning him out. Worse than these antics though, was his tendency to get things consistently wrong. Player’s names, team’s cities, scores, stats, and penalties all get butchered again and again.
Now, every broadcaster makes a flub on occasion. They’re not only forgivable, but inevitable. Gruden’s mistakes however receive my ire for his staunch belief that everything he says is correct. He’s as arrogant as Brian Billick, but without the intelligence to back it up.
My favorite moment of Jon Gruden’s tenure on the mic happened this year when normally reserved and understated Mike Pereira decided he had had enough, and called him out in the press, saying, “I am not a fan of Gruden’s. Not today, not yesterday. He was a loudmouth as a coach who constantly disrespected league officials and he is a blowhard in the broadcast booth who spouts off when he doesn’t know what he’s talking about. I have very little respect for him when it comes to officiating and his knowledge of the rules.”
Pereira then went on to point out mistakes Gruden had made during a subsequent broadcast.
Wow.
It takes a lot for me to cheer for a ref, but when I read that, I couldn’t stop laughing.
Hopefully, some team will throw a bunch of money at him, and he can go back to just annoying officials instead of the Monday Night Football audience.
